by The Bathtub Project
Date of Interview: January 7, 2017
Location: Washington, DC
If you were an underwater creature, which one would you be?
So, I actually don’t love the ocean, but I did some research on this question. I looked up creatures that are solitary in nature, and the first thing to come up was an octopus. Yeah, I guess I would be an octopus. They’re considered one of the most intelligent and behaviorally diverse creatures in the ocean, which I thought was really cool.
What are you passionate about?
The word passionate is kind of tricky to me, because I feel like there has to be a monumental action that follows it. So if I say “I’m passionate about music”, I should be making it. If I say “I’m passionate about literature”, I should be writing it. If I say “I’m passionate about equality or human rights”, I should be marching for it. But I don’t… and that doesn’t mean I’m not passionate about those things, because I am – my actions are just not as monumental. I’m passionate about music, so I listen to it. I’m passionate about literature, so I read it. I’m passionate about equality and human rights, so I believe in it and I stand with my friends in support. I will say something that has become more important to me that I’ve become passionate about is self awareness and… I feel like I’ve always been self aware of things that I want out of this life, but I don’t think, until very recently, I’ve been aware about my worth. I’m a catch. I hate saying that because it sounds like such a conceited thing to say, but I really don’t think it is. Recently I’ve been like fuck yeah, I’m a catch and I’m a queen and you’re a queen and we should be going after relationships that back that up. That’s something that I’ve become extremely passionate about, is this self awareness discovery. I feel like I’ve been on it for awhile now I guess.
What was the catalyst for that discovery?
So I’ve been single for a year and a half and before my previous relationship I was single for three years. I’ve spent a lot of my 20’s being single and number one; I think that’s fantastic. But I’m just like every other person, I want to be able to find whomever my person is and live whatever life we’re destined to live. In the summer I met this guy and we had this amazing connection and this chemistry was undeniable. I immediately realized that… this could be it. I thought that relatively soon. It ended up that I was wrong, of course. He would disappear, and then kept coming back, saying things that made it seem like he wanted all of these things with me. And we kept doing this cycle. This last time he disappeared again, which was not too long ago, I realized I felt really good. Like so good about this. Because I’ve given it three chances and it’s obviously not gonna work out. Immediately I was like, “what the fuck am I doing?” I realized that I deserve so much better than this. I deserve someone who actually wants to be with me, and that his actions match his words. So, it’s been pretty recent that I’ve had this total epiphany, but I think it’s been something I’ve been working towards the past few years.
What do you think of platonic relationships?
I think platonic relationships are so important. I’m not going to say I’m “blessed” because I don’t like saying that word in general. But I do feel like I’m so extremely lucky, and I don’t know what I did right in my life to deserve the people that I have in it. One of my closest friends, she also lives here and we went to high school together. We weren’t close in high school, but now we are and… she’s one of the best people that I know! I don’t think I would be able to enjoy my time as much if she wasn’t here. There’s a handful of people in my life that I’m so lucky to have. Those relationships are super important, when you’re single and even when you’re with someone in a romantic way.