by The Bathtub Project
Date of Interview: June 25, 2018.
Name: Becca Brown
Pronouns: She/Her and They/Them
How often do you bathe or shower?
I shower every day at least once. Baths are not a thing that I regularly do, so thank you so much for letting me bathe.
Is showering every day part of your routine?
Yes. I shower to wake my body up. I have very complicated skin, so I also do– as a part of my daily ritual, I do a lot of skincare. And a lot of that is stuff that lives on my face and I have to let it dry on my face. And in my current apartment situation, there’s only one sink and it is in the kitchen, so I prefer to get all that off in the shower. So sometimes I shower twice a day. Yesterday, I showered thrice. I showered once in the morning, and then I went for a long walk, and I got really sweaty, and was going to the beach. So I showered before going to the beach, and then when I went to the beach, I got sand all up in my everything, so I had to shower it out [laughter].
What are you passionate about?
I’m passionate about art. Creating. Doing. Making. I love making art. I love seeing art. Always looking for new, interesting forms of art to see or experience. I see a lot of plays and musicals, and read a lot of poetry, and go to different kinds of shows, concerts. Ever since I was a little girl, I loved going to concerts, and seeing theater, and going to fucking Disney on Ice. And any kind of performance, any kind of art museums, galleries, etc., that’s kind of been a huge thing for my entire life.
How do these passions manifest in a day-to-day practice?
Well, right now, I am doing School at Steppenwolf, which is, for me, one of the biggest accomplishments I could ever ask for. And I probably wouldn’t be here if– I don’t know. I am going through a bit of a spiritual reimagining of myself and realignment of myself. So right now, my passion is manifesting in getting to work for my favorite theater company that’s ever existed. The place that, ever since I started acting, was the place for me, that I’m like, “I want to work there. I have to work there. I must.” And now getting to study under these amazing professors who are like-minded and equally as driven as I am and as my classmates are. Artists who are working – directors, actors, casting directors, etc. – in my field is such a gift. And then when I get home, after I’m done doing my homework, I cook for myself, and that’s my one thing that I do that doesn’t have to do with art.
What is your favorite thing to feed yourself?
Right now, I taught myself recently how to make a biscuit in a mug. It’s also gluten-free. I found this recipe on the keto Reddit. And I put almond flour, and eggs, some cheese, baking powder, and a bunch of herbs in a mug. I whip it all up and microwave it for three minutes, and then out pops a little biscuit. And it’s so quick and so easy, and if you use the right amount of cheese, it can be comparable to the Red Lobster biscuits. It’s awesome.
What do you feel is your biggest accomplishment?
My biggest accomplishment is– right now, I’m going through it. It’s crazy and I never thought I’d be able to say this, but I have six months of continuous sobriety. Without that, I am fucked. Without sobriety, I am either in jail, in the hospital, or dead. So I’m very grateful to be able to say that I haven’t had a drink in six months. And getting sober has opened up so many doors for me, not only as an artist but as a person. It’s great. I feel like my inner child is so happy right now, and I’m getting to see people for the first time, and I’m getting to know myself for the first time. And I don’t know, she’s pretty cool. I like her so far [laughter]. Right now, I’m kind of still in the pink cloud phase of, “I love being sober.” And there are days where I’m like, “Fuck, I hate this. Fuck. I wish I could just drink or smoke a blunt.” But I wouldn’t. I wouldn’t. I just wouldn’t. I can’t. And a big part of getting sober that was scary for me was when I do stand-up, I would usually lubricate. So I was like, “I’ll be funnier if I’m a little loose, a little drunk, a little on my toes and able to riff.” And I was so scared that cutting out alcohol and drugs would make me not funny anymore, make me not fun, make me not a good artist anymore. But it’s actually made me so much better. The material that I’m writing now is much more honest, and it’s not about a boy who didn’t text me back. It’s about how wonderful the world can be sometimes. And it sounds so cheeseballs, but– it’s very cheesy, but it’s very real for me right now.
What are your thoughts on relationships, platonic, sexual, familial, and otherwise?
Honesty is the best thing, in general. Communication is so important in relationships. And for a long time, I think, in my addictive past, I would just do the opposite of the right thing all the time. And while I haven’t tried being in a relationship yet sober, the friendships that I’m making and the connections that I’m making with people in my family – my chosen family and my blood family – is so amazing. And I think that, yeah, it’s so much easier to be honest with people than to lie, than to have to remember, “Oh, what did I tell this person? What did I tell that person?” And having to correct yourself, or really think through what you said [laughter]. It’s so much easier to fucking tell the truth. It can be hard because sometimes the truth is really ugly or messy. But I’m kind of giving myself permission to be ugly and be messy for the first time because it’s so much easier to do that than covering it up and being fake.
If you were an underwater creature, which one would you be?
An octopus. An octopus, for sure. Octopus is the only animal that I don’t eat because they’re so smart, and they are graceful and ferocious, and I feel like I identify with all of that. Yeah. And also, all those arms, they’ve got to be really good at multitasking, and I can relate [laughter].