THEBATHTUBPROJECT

exploring vulnerability and transparency one bath at a time

Tag: Friendship

Mykalee “Mykie” McGowan

Mykalee McGowan

 

Date of Interview: November 4, 2016

Name: Mykalee “Mykie” McGowan

Age: 23

Pronouns: She/Her

Location: Washington, DC

 

How often do you bathe or shower?

I try to do it like, twice a day. That’s showering, baths, I want to start doing that once a week and things of that nature with spiritual baths. So, alright, so I say that I’m a witch and I feel that baths are very healing and it’s very calm. And you know, sometimes showers just don’t do it for me. So I want to take spiritual baths once a week to unwind, get the stress out, relax as well as doing some witchy shit like setting intentions and doing spells. Yeah.

If you were an underwater creature which one would you be? Mythical or real.

Cool beans, cuz the first thing that popped in my head is a mermaid. I would be a mermaid! Yeah, I feel like the human form sometimes is not negative, but it’s whatever while still being cool. You can have the fishy aspect and the human aspect, I wouldn’t want to get totally rid of the human part.

What are you passionate about?

I’m passionate about creating, I’m passionate about expressing myself as well as showing people dope shit. And dope events. And bringing dope people to dope people. I am kind of known as the person who knows everybody, that knows everything that’s going on. I have my friends telling me “GIRL! You should have told me about that event, what the hell!” Because I just like what people do and I just want to show that to the world and help people express that and help them express themselves. But right now I’m trying to learn to express myself cuz I’m dope too ::laughs::.

What do you feel is your biggest accomplishment?

My biggest accomplishment is starting my own business. My biggest accomplishment is starting my own business because I’m the only one in my family that has done that. I think about where I was in 2015, I was broke as fuck, my father had just passed away, dealing with a lot of depression and anxiety and stuff like that. To now, when I started my business in July, to know that I’m the only person in my family to have done that. It just feels really really good, it feels really sweet ::laughs::. Especially because I’m the black sheep of my family and a lot of times, my mom asks “what are you doing?”. It just feels good to have something that I own.

What do you mean by black sheep?

I mean I’m the black sheep cuz I’m the one… So my sister was in the army. My other sister graduated college on time and she’s the youngest, she’s a year younger than I am, she has a job and a car and a house. And here I am trying to figure it all out in this very small room, in this house in DC. When you’re raised by Jamaican parents, having a secure and normal career is what they want for you. But I can’t physically, mentally, or emotionally get a “normal” job. Whenever I try, It always backfires. Like, God won’t let me. So to be outside of a having a car/house/job, that’s me being a black sheep. Yeah. And I’m still doing okay!

What is something that you still struggle with?

Accepting myself, and all of myself. Expressing myself and all of myself too, I tend to try to form myself in the way that I think people will like me to be. I felt that my past self was like a parasite. When it came to lovers, when it came to friends, I felt like I would try to stick on to them because I think they’re amazing and that I wasn’t amazing enough. I would try to form to be like, the sassy side chick or the bomb ass lover and now I’m in a space where I have to be me. So I’m alone a lot of the time and I force myself to be alone to see myself and deal with myself alone so I can be like, “Mykalee, you are cool and you do have flaws but everybody has flaws”. And yeah. That’s how things are right now.

What do you think of relationships? Platonic, sexual and otherwise.

Oh my God. Ohhhhh okay ::laughs:: SO relationships! Oh my God, platonic ones. I’m actually learning to express myself and be out there more. A challenge I had in the beginning of summer was to see more people. Talk to more people and stuff, so I think that’s really good. But when it comes to romantic relationships I’m not the one. I’ve tried polyamory, I’ve tried monogamy, now it’s just plain old I don’t want to talk to nobody ::laughs::. At this moment in time, ya know, there are times because it’s people, times that it’s myself, it’s a way to protect myself. I haven’t successfully navigated romantic relationships at this moment. Gotta find my way, I know I’ll get there one day. And regardless of if I’m with many people or with one or by myself, I’m gonna be fine. Sexually, I love sex. I love sex, even though I’ve been celibate for a year to protect myself, and try to shed some energy that’s been old and needs to be moved, sex is good. Sex is alright by me. That’s it ::laughs::.

What are you afraid of for the world?

I’m afraid that people will just not… I feel like people already don’t accept each other. And if you say you’re something, I should just acknowledge it instead of being like, WELL this states or that states, you know, if I’m saying I’m a certain thing you need to respect that. Just do that! I don’t think it’s a hard thing to do. A lot of the time I do feel that, but there is such a division going on. And it doesn’t have to be that way.

What are you afraid of for yourself?

I’m afraid to fail. I’m afraid to be homeless, I’m afraid to succumb to my depression and anxieties. I think about that a lot. But I’m also afraid to succeed because success draws more responsibility and I’m someone who is easily overwhelmed and I don’t want that to take over.

What did you see today that was beautiful?

I saw a couple at my favorite cafe. They were just… So sweet together. I thought about my mom and my stepfather, it was just those candid tiny moments, those beautiful moments.

 

Heather Funk

Heather Funk

 

Date of Interview: November 2, 2016

Name: Heather Funk

Age: 29

Pronouns: She/Her

Location: Washington, DC

 

How often do you bathe or shower?

I dunno, maybe at least once a day, sometimes twice… At least once.

If you were a underwater creature which one would you be?

What do you classify as underwater? Could I be a sea otter? Sea otter. I find that I am cuddly and playful like sea otters and I have a lot of hair on my head so I identify with their double fur layers. I think it would be really great to have armpit pockets, you know they store tools in their armpit pockets? I would love to have something where I could carry a rock around in my armpit. ::Laughs:: It’s so weird but I’ve thought a lot about this before.

What are you passionate about?

That is, I think, something that I’ve been exploring a lot these days because it’s changing… It used to be art. And then it was art and logistics because I have an art and logistics background. I can’t remember a time when creativity wasn’t there. I think since I was a kid, I’ve always loved art and always loved being creative, it was very much encouraged in me so that’s just kid of developed. I think some of it has to do with my zodiac sign, I’m an Aquarius so I’m creative! And stubborn and independent! I think… Creativity, you know, I can’t remember a time when it wasn’t there, when I wasn’t imagining things or like, coming up with new ideas for something. It used to be art related but now it’s kind of changed to being business related, but it’s always been there. But recently I’ve been thinking about how, this is my own personal development I guess… Like, travel has always been something I’ve been really passionate about but, in terms of a career, people talk a lot about passions with a career, and that’s where I’m kind of lost right now and have been thinking about where my passions are going to lead me.

What is your favorite medium?

To work with or to view? Work with, it has to be metal working, something with my hands, like more intense industrial jewelry design, which I haven’t done in a long time. But I think to view… To collect and to purchase it has to be photography. To view in a gallery or in a museum setting, I got to think about that one. It’s kind of like asking what’s your favorite color. You like them all for different reasons, right? I can’t answer that I like them all. Actually that’s a lie, I like installations. Installations have to be my favorite because there’s so much involvement and the viewer is within the piece, right. It’s all about the viewer’s experience.

What are you afraid of for the world?

Oh man… For the world. Maybe the zombie apocalypse. But in all reality, running out of our resources. And how we collectively can come together as a world, as an international community, because I feel that we all have our own thoughts separately, but we need to come together for humanity. With the way things are going now I don’t think it’s possible but you know, communities have been developing over centuries, forever, and so I think the idea of community is growing in terms of numbers now and I don’t think we’re at that point yet but I hope we get there soon. I think it’s possible, just not for a while.

What is something you still struggle with?

Vulnerability. Which is why I’m doing this. Seriously ::laughs::. I read about you guys in a thing by We The People, somebody posted about The Bathtub Project and I was like, “Cool! I like this idea!” And so the idea of being vulnerable, there’s a stigma of weakness involved. But in a lot of ways you’re a lot stronger for being vulnerable and being openly vulnerable. I’ve been coming to terms with that in the last year or two and that’s why… Vulnerability! That’s why I’m doing this.

What do you think of relationships? Platonic, sexual and otherwise.

Let’s see… Relationships. I think they’re very important and integral to human development and to human happiness. I think if you’re alone, even if you’re isolated, everyone needs some relationship in some compactly. I very much value my platonic relationships, my friendships. That’s something that this last year, I spent a lot of time this last year or two of musing on my relationships with men in a romantic setting, but your friends… They don’t owe you anything. You’re not having sex, most times, with your friends right? So a friendship is the purest form of a relationship in some ways and if you can accept each other for exactly who you are and love each other for who you are in a friendship, that is the highest, purest form of relationship that I think there is out there. At the same time, this other level though, being in a romantic relationship you have the benefit of this other person sticking by your side who wants to be with you and you have that sexual component which is always fun. So… Those are my thoughts on relationships.

May Pierce

May Pierce

 

Date of Interview: October 7, 2016

Name: May Pierce

Age: 26

Pronouns: She/Her

Location: Toledo, OH

 

How often do you bathe or shower?

Every day. Bathing is not a thing though, usually. I don’t know why.

If you were an underwater creature, which one would you be?

A slermaid! A sloth-mermaid, of course. Because I love sloths, and I’m a mermaid. I was born to be a mermaid. So it’s a slermaid, there you go. Are you jealous? :laughter:: You might be, I can tell. Were you born near a body of water? Yes, I was born near a body of water. I was born in Israel, I used to walk by the beach all the time. And I used to sneak out of school to go to the beach. Which is a no no, children don’t do that. I guess I should be parental. Uhh, yeah. I like the beach. It’s relaxing, it’s cool, there’s a bunch of sea creatures. Once I lost my sunglasses when I was in South Carolina, and I still believe that an octopus is wearing them. So there’s that. I like octopus, octopi- octopi? Octopi. Octopusses. Meeses, mooses, ::laughter:: who know, the English language is weird.

How many languages do you know?

Two, just Hebrew and English. And then I know how to count to five in Arabic, no big deal.

Do you think thoughts in one language?

Both. Think in both, dream in both. But it’s funny because, when I dream in Hebrew and it’s somebody that would speak English, that’s when I know it’s a dream. So, I figured that one out.

Do you have certain memories or ties to the extent that when you think in one language you feel a certain emotion?

No. No, I was very bummed though when I was hanging out with NSync in a dream and they were speaking in Hebrew. So that my recent emotion. Still a dream to me NSync, no big deal. Just a normal dream every little girl has.

What are you passionate about?

Baking! And cooking healthy food, which is is kind of funny, because they’re not really the same thing. I don’t eat processed sugar, so essentially I’m like a drug dealer. Sugar is a drug. I sell it, and I don’t eat my profits. So there’s that. Some people call me a drug dealer when I give them samples, because it’s addicting. I’m sure kids know that sugars very addicting. So yeah, my names May and I’m a drug dealer of sugar. No big deal, totally normal.

When did you find you passion for cooking and baking?

When I was vegan. So when I was like 20… 20, 19? So I was vegan, and Toledo is pretty sucky when it comes to vegan stuff, so I had to start learning how to cook things that my mom would make, but without dairy or meat or eggs. And then I fell in love with it, I don’t know, it was fun. And I still think it’s fun, and then I went to school for it And working in way too may restaurants to count, and then decided that I want to bake for the rest of my life. Because, people don’t bake well. People will just do cupcakes and cakes, and things that people are familiar with, which is unfortunate. And I understand why, but there is so much more than just cupcakes and cakes in the world. And unless you live in Europe or the Middle East, it seems that people are afraid of it. So I’m here to, you know, not be spooky and you know, shove French macrons in your mouth. ::laughter:: but, not in a sexual way, that would be really weird, I’m just a drug dealer. I will never force you to eat something… maybe. We’ll see. Unless like I make like, mock-liver and you’re like, “I hate mushrooms.” And I’m like, “No you don’t, you just never had mock-liver. And now I can prove you wrong, so” It tastes like chicken, like chicken pate, but it’s just mushrooms, walnuts, honey or you can use agave if you’re against honey, and salt and pepper, and caramelized onions, and it’s amazing. It’s my favorite dip. I just kind of eat it with a spoon, but whatever, we can call it a dip. But yeah, it’s very Jew-y. It’s true, Jews eat a lot of liver. It’s a thing, I don’t know.

What do you think of religion?

I don’t do it. I’m not going to heaven, I’m going straight to hell. So sorry, sorry mom. Uhh, I don’t know. When I was in the 2nd grade, because I lived in Israel, we had to take bible classes, or Torah classes I should call them. Annndd, I sat in my room, I was like 8 years old. I sat in my room and was like, “Is God real?” and was like this is giving me a headache I never want to think if this again, and so that was it. It’s been… it’s been real. ::laughter:: it’s been real for the last 20 years, so that’s my opinion of it. I’m totally fine with other people practicing. You do whatever makes you happy, but it doesn’t make me happy. Do you think heaven and hell exist? Meh… I don’t know. I don’t think about it, I think about today and that’s it. But if I was going somewhere, it definitely wouldn’t be the good place. Whoopsies! I mean whatever, unless like, making yourself happy is not a sin, so then I would be going to the good place. Because I try to make myself happy. So, depends on how you look at it. What makes you happy? Uhh… being successful. Doing what I like to do, selling it to people, and getting compliments about it. But like legitimate compliments, not like, “OH I’m just writing this because I feel bad.” That’s what makes me happy. And making the people around me happy. Not just with sugar, but you know with other things that are not sugar. I don’t know, that’s what makes me happy. Having a clean house makes me happy. Having a good meal makes me happy. Uhh, yeah, food makes me happy. Ok? That’s really the bottom line, food make me happy. My dog makes me happy. She’s cool, she’s not food, ‘cause you know, she’s a dog. My dog should never be food, maybe she’ll be a statue after she dies, at my house, that would be cool. But yeah, I can only hope. Only hope I’ll have the money ::whispers:: she’ll be beautiful. Oh that’d be glorious.

What do you think of relationships? Platonic, sexual, or otherwise.

I’m in a relationship, I’ve been in one for two years. Umm, they’re hard. They’re time-consuming, they’re emotional, kind of weird about feelings a lot. Uhh, they’re there. I mean people want to be happy with a partner, so that’s cool, that’s why we do it. But they’re hard, it’s another job. So there’s that, when you work 90 hours it’s even harder. And when both you and your partner works 90 hours, it gets even harder. So it’s a job, it’s a hard job. But you know, it’s rewarding, in the end. Build a home, have dogs, put up a fence, with your friend who’s helping you for free. But yeah, that’s what I feel about it. Family is the most important thing, as long as you like your family. If you don’t like your family, then your friends become your family and THEY’RE the most important thing. So family is always the most important thing, even if it’s not blood. That’s what I think about it. They complete you when you’re sad, they’re there when you’re happy. They’re there when you just want someone to hang out with you while you’re baking by yourself in a dark sub shop. Umm, they’re there when they’re sweating and they ask you to get face towels so they can stop sweating. But yeah, that’s what friends are. And it doesn’t matter if you don’t see them for 20 years, they’re still friends.

What are you afraid of for yourself?

Uhh… failure. But I don’t know what failure is. I mean, I’ve failed at many things, but then they taught me, or I realized that what I thought that I wanted is not what I wanted. So I don’t know what failure is, but whatever it is is what scares me. Losing all my money, because I’ve lived with and without money, so I… I’m not saying money is the most important things, but… I don’t know, I’m more realistic about it. And that freaks me out, to think about running out of everything, everything I’ve saved up. So that’s my fear I suppose. Is working hard for something and then losing it. Whatever that it, whether it’s money, or ideas, or ::sigh:: I don’t know.

What is something that you feel you’ve accomplished?

Ooh! One of my moments of realizing that I’ve done something good in this community. Unless you think that sugar is bad. Is going to places, and introducing myself as May, and then people immediately saying, “The baker?” Or me being at weddings where I bake, and people are stuffing their faces with sweets and then people telling me, “Oh I usually get these at the sub shop!” That’s always fun. So yeah, I like that. That’s when I feel accomplished. And yelling at students that cut their fingers. I’m the teacher that yells, “Bearclaw!” all the time. I mean it’s their fingers! I’m just helping the next generation to not cut themselves.

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