THEBATHTUBPROJECT

exploring vulnerability and transparency one bath at a time

Tag: Literature

Alexander Detellio

 

Date of Interview: June 14, 2017

Name: Alexander Detellio

Age: 27

Pronouns: He/Him

Location: Chicago, IL

 

How often do you bathe or shower?

Normally, I’m a once a day person. But when it’s really gross out I sometimes shower twice a day [laughter]. Mainly showers. Although, when I’m depressed, I take baths. This is one of the most un-depressing baths I’ve had in a very long time [laughter].

If you were an underwater creature what would it be?

I’ve always been obsessed with giant squids. That’s from reading “20,000 Leagues Under the Sea” growing up. So I guess I would be that [laughter].

Do your books play a major role in your life?

Yeah. My life revolves around literature, not just my everyday life but specifically my hopes and dreams for life. It’s very influenced by all sorts of stories.

What are you passionate about?

Well, literature, obviously but I think in a more general sense, storytelling is something that I feel has a moral force. So I’ve developed a passion for stories, but it doesn’t have to just be fiction or books. Even the best philosophy, which is something else that I’m passionate about, can also tell a story- even if it’s veiled in philosophical jargon. This is something I’m discovering about myself recently: being an outcast growing up, I retreated to stories and it was something that gave me a release and then as I got older and studied stories, I don’t know, I was able to figure out how stories can affect people more generally. So I guess a combination of my experience growing up and then wanting to help other people in finding out that stories can do that.

What do you feel is your biggest accomplishment?

In life in general? I guess probably writing my undergraduate thesis [laughter]. Well, because part one is an academic essay and part two is a short story. The short story was just a bit longer than the essay and actually helped me work on a lot of questions I have about the world. And also doing it in such a way that gave it a formal merit. I felt super accomplished by writing this short story that other people who read it thought was pretty decent.

What is something you still struggle with?

Something I struggle with. I guess probably overcoming kind of depressive states that– I don’t even know how to put this– that I force on myself to an extent. Like wallowing in that sort of thing. And I think that probably stems from my experiences when I was younger. I mean, high school’s a fucking terrible place and I was definitely an overweight kind of nerdy kid and the jocks loved picking on me for that. So that was that sort of thing. And then there’s other stuff I guess. Parents [inaudible] divorce when I was 12 or 13. That affected it as well. But it turns out that that was for the better so in hindsight yeah [laughter].

What do you think of relationships, platonic, sexual, and otherwise?

Oh, well. Humans are relational creatures obviously. It’s how we function. So I value relationships pretty heavily, although I’m the type of person where, at different points of my life, I’ve had different types of relationships as you know. So in some cases, I’ve had lots of friends and only a few really close friends. And in other cases, it’s gone the other way. As I’ve gotten a little bit older, I think I value quality relationships. That being said, sexual relationships have probably been more quantity than quality over the years. But I think that’s because I’m narcissistic or something [laughter]. There’s some truth for you [laughter].

What does the word relationship mean to you?

What sense of the word relationship do you mean? I don’t know. I guess it’s like there’s different types of love, right? Different Greek words for love. And this is from me studying religious things but [inaudible]. There’s romantic love, there’s familial love, friendship love, and the one that may or may not be there: God love. And I guess, I– that fits it pretty well. And we don’t have English words for that. So the Greek words work pretty well. I don’t know. I guess I follow that pretty closely.

 

Megan

Megan Larson

Date of Interview: January 7, 2017

Name: Megan

Age: 28

Pronouns: She/Her

Location: Washington, DC

If you were an underwater creature, which one would you be?

So, I actually don’t love the ocean, but I did some research on this question.  I looked up creatures that are solitary in nature, and the first thing to come up was an octopus. Yeah, I guess I would be an octopus. They’re considered one of the most intelligent and behaviorally diverse creatures in the ocean, which I thought was really cool.

What are you passionate about?

The word passionate is kind of tricky to me, because I feel like there has to be a monumental action that follows it. So if I say “I’m passionate about music”, I should be making it. If I say “I’m passionate about literature”, I should be writing it.  If I say “I’m passionate about equality or human rights”, I should be marching for it. But I don’t… and that doesn’t mean I’m not passionate about those things, because I am – my actions are just not as monumental. I’m passionate about music, so I listen to it. I’m passionate about literature, so I read it. I’m passionate about equality and human rights, so I believe in it and I stand with my friends in support. I will say something that has become more important to me that I’ve become passionate about is  self awareness and… I feel like I’ve always been self aware of things that I want out of this life, but I don’t think, until very recently, I’ve been aware about my worth. I’m a catch. I hate saying that because it sounds like such a conceited thing to say, but I really don’t think it is. Recently I’ve been like fuck yeah, I’m a catch and I’m a queen and you’re a queen and we should be going after relationships that back that up. That’s something that I’ve become extremely passionate about, is this self awareness discovery. I feel like I’ve been on it for awhile now I guess.

What was the catalyst for that discovery?

So I’ve been single for a year and a half and before my previous relationship I was single for three years. I’ve spent a lot of my 20’s being single and number one; I think that’s fantastic. But I’m just like every other person, I want to be able to find whomever my person is and live whatever life we’re destined to live. In the summer I met this guy and we had this amazing connection and this chemistry was undeniable. I immediately realized that… this could be it. I thought that relatively soon. It ended up that I was wrong, of course. He would disappear, and then kept coming back, saying things that made it seem like he wanted all of these things with me. And we kept doing this cycle. This last time he disappeared again, which was not too long ago, I realized I felt really good. Like so good about this. Because I’ve given it three chances and it’s obviously not gonna work out. Immediately I was like, “what the fuck am I doing?” I realized that I deserve so much better than this. I deserve someone who actually wants to be with me, and that his actions match his words. So, it’s been pretty recent that I’ve had this total epiphany, but I think it’s been something I’ve been working towards the past few years.

What do you think of platonic relationships?

I think platonic relationships are so important. I’m not going to say I’m “blessed” because I don’t like saying that word in general. But I do feel like I’m so extremely lucky, and I don’t know what I did right in my life to deserve the people that I have in it. One of my closest friends, she also lives here and we went to high school together. We weren’t close in high school, but now we are and… she’s one of the best people that I know! I don’t think I would be able to enjoy my time as much if she wasn’t here. There’s a handful of people in my life that I’m so lucky to have. Those relationships are super important, when you’re single and even when you’re with someone in a romantic way.

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